The new
year started like any other. Big dreams, and a week or so later, shattered
hopes. A crossroads of sorts. “Will I face the fight, or will I be conquered
once again?” Yet, this time, things had to be different. All through my youth
I’d been overweight. I’d either maintained my weight or gained weight. Besides
occasional bouts with stomach flu, I’d never really lost weight. It felt as if
I didn’t do something now, I’d keeping gaining, and eventually it would be more
than cosmetic.
Though I’d
fallen once again in the pursuit of a noble goal, the winds of change were
blowing. I’d recently had some other successes in self-restraint; my pool of
will-power was the deepest it had ever been. That fateful mid-January day, I
dug deep into my reservoir of self-restraint and began the journey of a
thousand miles with one step. Actually, the journey began with a push-up at 6
AM.
I started
each morning by working out. Running, push-ups, and crunches at 6 AM or
earlier. I kept the good mornings rolling by eating a healthy, but certainly
not delicious, breakfast of quinoa, eggs, and a plateful of fresh vegetables,
hold the ranch. For lunch, I’d eat another plateful of vegetables. Even as I
recount my feat, I’m still amazed that I ate celery daily. Celery is
disgusting. I stopped eating deserts, something I’d been doing every night
after dinner. My portions shrank, and where I’d once eaten two or three
servings, I contented myself with one.
By early
May, I’d lost 35 pounds. What I lost in mass, I gained in self-confidence,
understanding, and vision.
It’s easy think
that the confidence I gained is the type that comes from looking slim and
handsome. It’s true I felt some of that, but that confidence is superficial. It
comes and goes, but it mostly goes as time isn’t kind to anyone’s looks. The
confidence I gained and treasure to this day I’ll have no matter how I look on
the outside. It’s a confidence that I can do difficult things. I have
confidence that when the going gets tough, I get going. I’ve needed that
confidence for challenges in the intervening years, and I know with that
confidence I can conquer the challenges ahead.
My
understanding of life, beginning with this experience and culminating quite
recently, has changed drastically. While I once thought of life’s challenges as
bumps in the road of a perfect life, I don’t see it that way anymore. I see
life as undergirded by what I call the buffet principle. Eat lots of food, have
a good time, and waddle out feeling sick to your stomach. That may have some
parallels with life, but that’s not the buffet principle I’m talking about.
Rather, it’s the eat your money’s worth buffet principle. When I encounter
adversity, I don’t see it as a detraction from my life, I see it as exactly
what I’m meant to experience in life. When adversity comes and I choose to face
it and learn from it, I’m learning the lessons I need to learn. I’m getting my
money’s worth out of life. That understanding and attitude has buoyed me up
when I really needed it and kept me focused on the things that matter most.
My weight
loss experience changed my vision. While I once scanned the vista of life and
saw lots of experiences and goals that felt unobtainable, I know see an
exciting vista of opportunities. Since that time, I’ve accomplished things I
once never thought possible, things I never would’ve tried.
It all
started with a little gumption and a push-up.
